Hero Lies In You

grrrawh. hungry for blogging.

Hoho! the last time i updated was on 20may. Gawd. Jauh nyeh hari. 5days tak touch computer. 5days tak blogged. hehe. Missed this. kkay, my texting kinda sucks.

Anyway. skipped that.

So had mother tongue intensive program since last friday. We have to really train intensively for our upcoming O level mother tongue Exam. So i really practise hard. It's really a bore to have the same subject over and over again each and every morning. Luckily on thursday is already the end. Oh and, We're having a girls day out on friday. I can't wait! More people follow please! So gerek to just have everyone i adore. The confirm ones are Farahin, Fiqah, Nurin, Natasha and me! (: Maaaahsuuuuriiii && Asyiiiiiiiiiiqqqiiiiiiiin! Ikot la! Aku geram tau ngan korang! Tak pernah keluar together2! haiyaaa! One day ok?

Alot of things happens this pass few days. Have alot of fights going on here and there. And it's so fcuking pissed me off. Macam aper siaah. First SEKALI, pasal 2 pompan cina sial kat bugis ale ale cari gado. Like excuse me la, we were eating Ayam(yumm) and they were sitting besides us. Kite perasan they were talking about us when they say 'step friendly' like what the fook kan? Padehal korang tak kenal kite saper, tak ya nak bobal gituh uh sia. Muker pun tak perlu la eh. Perangain adeq2 pe siaaah? grhhh. Aku macam dah anti ciner. grrrrraaawhhh. fook betul.

Second gado pasal Si dua jantan tu. Si Jerk and Casanova. Such bastard. Such coward. Tak nak elaborate la. Our facebook shows it all. I'm trying to move on alone right now. I don't know if i can cope.

sweetest hello,

5/25/2010 08:10:00 PM

Left me out.

" Now i'm hurt. It's my mistakes. I've should know right away.

I put him first. I thought he'd stay"

Sorry people. Currently no phone. Jatuh dalam air. So now, not using phone. Great. Now, noone can find me that way. I'm happy. ^^

Anyway. get results today. Was waiting for this day to come. Early in the moring get out chemistry paper first. Hoho! I failed. Malas nak elaborate. So here is just the results. Overall, i failed two subjects. The common weak ones. But, there's still hope. I'm waiting for report book to be published because it's he final scores.

My lucky number for this year mid year is 22 taw. Almost all the paper i score 22. grrh!

Chemistry: 22/50

Biology: 22/50

Social Studies: 22/50

History: 33/50

Mathematics paper 1: 16/70

Mathematics paper 2: 22/80

English paper 2: 42/80

Mother Tongue: 39/70

sweetest hello,

5/20/2010 08:31:00 PM

nasibku.

Berapa lama lagi aku harus bertahan?

Setiap hari aku berdoa, berdoa yang terbaik untuk kite. Aku mohon kepada Allah, tolongilah aku. Aku telah bersabar lama. Bila aku boleh merasakan kebahagian? Apa lagi aku harus hadapi? Aku betul tidak kuat. Aku penat sekali dengan semua cabaran ini. Aku tahu ini adalah pemberian mu Allah, aku cuba bersabar dan berdoa. Aku buntuh. Aku betul tidak tahu apa lagi harus ku laku kan. Harus kah aku berdiam diri sahaja supaya hanya masa dan tempat yang menentukan nasib ku?

Who's here to make me to forget him? Whenever i wanna do something's crazy or just go out and have fun. Never once worry about your skin tone, your appearance all that. I'm always the odd one out. I've always been the one who plan everything. To make everything work perfectly, but never once did. Being alone and enjoying things alone? It's just sad. I know i'm that kind of girls who loves playing soccer eventhough it's rough and would hurt myself(and kick anyhow),cycling, swimming, running, heights and all that extreme things. Who can i share those experiences with? I'm fat and i'm dark. So what? Sape kate kite tk leh berubah. We're not gonna be like this forever pe. Sooner or later i might be going everywhere alone. I love heights and extreme sports. I hate just doing all those girls-love-shopping stuff and girls-go-GAGA(s)-over-boy stuff. grrh. Everyone is different, i understand. I accept it. I don't care about who i am anyone or who i am to you matters anymore. Cause i know, God make me what i am now. I'm unperfect, i've tried to be perfect but i'm tired. Too tired anymore to try. I'm not pretty, i step to be pretty. I'm fat, i step to be skinny. What else? grrh. I'm really hating myself right now. Why couldn't anyone understand me. I guess you couldn't trust anyone.

I'm complaining to myself.

Anyone terasa, i tak tanggung.

I'm straightforward. I hate bottol-ing up my emotions. I wanna let it out.

I don't hate you, friends.

My circle of friends isn't wide enough.

I need another side of me...

22 more days

sweetest hello,

5/20/2010 12:43:00 AM

messages dari kaw bodo.

So today art exam. haiyaaa. dah give up suaaa. Ramai pun dah tak kuasa lagi pasal art. sedih kan? tengok je la results aku keluar macam maner. cepat2 la oral and lc habis. aku nak tawu results aku. Aku confidence taw pass atleast sumer and fail atleast one. aku dah blajar sungguh2 and setiap hari before each paper aku dah bacer doa. Haish. does it work? kene sabar.

pssssst.

*MASIHKAH ADA HARAPAN?*

ader la. kau tu masih ader harapan. jangan sia2 kan macam gitu aje.

kau jangan jadi macam aku.

NI MESSAGE DARI AL HAPEEEZ DAH LAMER GILER SIA!

4MAY2010

Aku post ni pasal si hapeeez ni macam setan. Dher tak nak aku pass maths. Ader ke gituh?

Hapeeez: Dh top up lah.. kau aku tak msg kau nnt kau panggil aku setan.. hehe. bsk aku eng paper2. kau?

Fanna: Oh. aku maths paper2, aku takut sia. blajar punyer blajar. tk masuk sial.

Hapeeez: Kalau last min belajar.. mane leh masuk otak

Fanna: biler maser aku ckp last min. aku dh blajar bnyk kali but still tak lei masok otak ni.

Hapeeez: Kau pun.. sebelum buat paper bacer doa banyak2 ah. ahahha.

Fanna: bukan sebelum aku buat paper tuh. dari aku keluar rumah sampai sekolah aku tak stop bacer doa! Dah laa, aku nak tido dulu ni. goodnight. takecare yerrr!

Hapeeez: Goodnight bye tc pape msg aku.. harap paper kau susah.. hahah. jkjk

Fanna: oi! setan la kau!

Hapeeez: Hahahahah. Kalau kau tahu tikam je. bsk lepas paper kau habis.. msg aku. aku nak dengar kau merane tk. hahahaha.

Fanna: alright! i'll msg you after my exam aites? kalau paper dhe susah, dasar kau setan.

Hapeeez:Hahaha. jangan kau mimpi aku kasi kau exam paper sua.. goodnight

sweetest hello,

5/17/2010 08:47:00 PM

ART ART ART

Currently. taking a break from art. Been doing and perfecting it since afternoon at 12pm.

Leaning on the computer chair while typing out. My shoulders pain after hours of slouching because have to lean forward and draw. And my hand pain due to drawing to much. My eyes pun boleh kater kan kero. tengok the same thing over and over again. Kalau lawa tkpe jugak. Tengok satu hari suntuk pun mater tak saket siul. grrrh. And, guess what. I haven't eat since morning. Stupid art make me skip my breakfast and lunch. Been texting Rin most of the time. That's because, we're both doing the same thing. And it's like we're stuck together. grrh! But i bet hers will be damn lawa. Confirm uh. Kater nurin. Artwork 100percent lawa. So yeah. Been texting Hin, Suri and Syiqin also. Gini prepaid aku boleh cakap byebye nampak nye. So basically. Aku really chiong untuk art siaow. Tolong la dapat high marks. Stress taw! Anyway. the pictures of my drawing is yet to be uploaded here. Nanty la biler2 aku free lagi yerh. Computer nihy was on dari tadi. Tapi aku malas nak log in user. So skrang ngah rest, tangkap peluang urh. hehe(:

PSSST. Ader bende lain lagi aku belum update pasal this past days.

I will update soon alright!

26 more days.

I hate going away. Eventho tak far.

sweetest hello,

5/16/2010 06:09:00 PM

aku benci kaw.

Eh, serious la.

aku macam nak pass around number kaw, setan.

Aku benci kau.

Sumpah, kau merepek. Perangai macam budak kecik.

Penat la aku type.

End sua.

sweetest hello,

5/15/2010 04:16:00 PM

in the midddle

Should i be happy or sad? For those who know, hoho! Ader orang tuh happy, tapi ader orang sedih. abehy aku aper? Tengah2? mampos. hmm.. Why this happen to me? I'm so gonna miss this place. like alot. It's not easy going to someplace that's new, It isn't easy at all to adapt to a new surronding.

"And if one day you realize that i'm not there for you anymore,

remember, that you're the one who pushed me away."

11may2010

12may is biology paper. so went to study kat tempat biaser. While waiting for iqaa to turun to beli her waffle, Ben and Amirus was playing soccer and i was really studying with earpiece on. Suddenly, something unexpected happen. Faizzuwan message asking whether free or not. Terperanjat gyler siul. Maner la dher nak message orang pagi2, selalu nyer malam je.

Faizzuwan: Fanna. kau free tak?

Fanna: Free. aku tengah belajar ni. asal?

Then dhe call. bukan nak msg, oh. dhe pun nak blajar urh. The next day maths paper dhe. And he thought i was at bedok, so easier to meet. Anyway, dhe datang tamp and we start studying. We teach him maths, padehal, maths kiter pun boleh tahan teruk. takpe, atleast we know what to teach him. After studying, talk3 until 9plus going to 10. Dhe balik dulu, then baru we walk and talk3. klakar la. korang belum tengok lagi brape kecoh kiter.

"Tak sangke gangster boleh blajar." that quote, dhe yang cakap, aku berubah kan sikit! ahhaha! (:

sweetest hello,

5/13/2010 05:07:00 PM

i miss you, gylerh.

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY FARHAN KEMBARKU!

How i truly miss you. grrh. Asal la kau tinggal jauh. Anyway, happy birthday yer! Enjoy kau nyerh day kat chalet. Aku rindu kau sangat la Bodoh. Aku msg wish kau happy birthday kau tak reply. Setan kau. Perangai tak berubah2. Chey. Enjoy your birthday. sorry lambat wish. See you soon alright? maner2 la. Sekali sekaler turun la Tampines. Bukan aku je yang rindu kau siol. Ramai. Nanti turun ngn Hyqal. Aku lagi rindu si abang aku tuh. haiyaaaa! xoxo. Fanna

sweetest hello,

5/08/2010 07:05:00 PM

awesome-ness

I know i'm fat and i know i'm short. And most of all, i'm not pretty. Kau ader problem perh sia? Alright, Fanna tak nak elaborate. Kalau nak kutok tengok tempat urh. Anyway, this were that time outing with family and kakak ira. Haish. I'm lazy and tkde mood nak update. Goodbye.

sweetest hello,

5/06/2010 05:12:00 PM

I hate this Technology

Maybe it isn't the time yet. I kept asking and i kept trying. Never knew we are still together.

I never wanted to let you go. Everyone knows who we are, but the pain we go through. Nobody knows. What else are we suppose to go through. I'm really tired. I really had enough. But.. I know you love me deeply, That's the reason why i kept moving on. Why i push this heartbreak away from destroying my love towards you. No matter how many guys i've know, you're the first that last long with me. You're the first whom i shared closely with. You're the first that my heart stubbornly wound'nt wanting to let go.

You're really different. Really one of a kind.

That problems you created. That cute voice i always hear when we're talking otp.

I swear. You're the first, I really love so much and would sacrifice the most.

I'm missing you right now.

Great. Now my computers acting childishly. Thanks computer. I love you la sangat ye. Stop creating problems boleh tak. Sakit perh? Nak penadol tak aku bagi? haiyaaa! Nak buka new windows pun tak bole. ape la. Kau dah tua eh? MSN kadang2 log out and in sendiri. Tagged and Facebook lagin pulak. Jahat pe kau kasi aku merane macam gini. Tolongla. Aku ni tengah in the proccess of having Mid-year. Kau tambah stress aku. Kau sebenarnye nak aku blaja eh? Bukan main dengan kau. Oops. Aku lupe. Kau tak lei cakap. Pandai la. Kau tak lei marah aku pasal aku tak blaja, tapi, kau nye perangai. Terlalu pandai ye. Show me your attitude lagi. Lagging lagi. Aku buang kau dalam dustbin baru tawu. Aku bawak kau gy doctor nak? Jadi boleh Repair kawan kau, Si CPU ni. Selamat kali ni kau tak buat perangai, keyboard. Kalau tak. Kau next aku bawak gy visit Doctor.

A'ah. Fanna memang boleh interact ngan non-living things. Korang sumer ni.. baru tawu ke?
Ish2.

sweetest hello,

5/04/2010 11:13:00 PM

farewell isn't goodbye

Family Outing. 2ndMAY2010
Dah rindu David. Rindu kakak Ira pulak! Haish. Ramai orang aku rindu. Meet kakak ira on 1st May also. Keluar with Family to tengok new house. Abehy teringat pasal kakak ira. Asked ibu to call her. When otp with her. I nearly cried. But i didn't blink my eye because don't wanna let the teardrops fall. Fanna ni kan. When she rindu orang, jangan kasi dhe bobal or look at the pictures with that person. Nanti dher confirm nangis. Missing one after another. Thanks kakak ira for the fun! manage to convice her for a sleepover. Before that we all pergi Simpang Bedok to eat. East Coast packed gyler. So it's my idea to makan kat saner. Eat sampai kenyang!

FAREWELL DePaula David. 1stMAY2010

Awww.. We just lose another classmates. Why do you have to go and Leave N2 forever? You're never coming back. Now, we don't have that guy who scores full marks for every maths test. Now, we don't have a classmate like you. Now, we feel you absence without you in 4N2. We really miss you. You've been a great friend, eventho i'm not close to you. I know you're a great friend that everyone can count on! Thanks for remembering my name. I'll miss the way you call my name. Chey. Eh, his voice hot ok. hahah! Itu adalah pujian untuk kawanku, David. lawled! So yeah, those pictures up there are moments with David at the airport. His mum told us that he cried the night before. Aww. Didn't expect that you also miss us. Thanks for liking the card full of wishes for you. Come visit Singapore every once in awhile alright!

CARNIVAL DAY. 30thAPRIL2010

School starts at 2pm on Friday as we have Carnival and Speech Day. So, i bangun kul 9plus. Switch on the computer and chat with Zeeq Zeeko. Get well soon yeah. Waited for Pixiedust to text. Mandi. Siap and keluar. I was late. Fiqah and Nurin dah sampai kat skola pun. Board 168, dropped at school bustop then terserempak with Mr Hafiz and some boys going to the Mosque for Friday Prayers. Meet Fiqah and Nurin at school gate. Took bus 8 to Afghan to take the 200 waffles for our stall. Grrh. Heavy and buat menyusahkan kiter. Tk dapat CIP points sehhs. graaaah! Dah sampai kedai tuh, orang bakery tuh suroh kite amek 5 trays dulu. ader lagy 5 trays belom siap. Kite kat situh dah tatawu aper nak buat. Coincidence, Iqaa baru habis exam. So she meet me up and help me out here. Thank you Iqaa and Syaz pasal dah tolong Fanna angkat and tahan kan taxi. Suri and Syiqin meet us up pun. Then while waitin for all of them to arrived. Nampak si Wan Macd pulak. He called my name, tak perasan. Then toleh baru nampak dhe. Then smiled at him je. Then nampak Acaaaap Boncet pulaaak! Halermak! Ramai aku terserempak nari. Abehy Wan Macd ngan si Acaaap tuhh... Kawaaan pulak. Aku tatawu sehh. Paisehh gilerhh siul! Arghh. Then belum habis. Dher ngn kawan2 dhe. So irritating. Lepas tuh, Terserempak ngn Syafiq pulak! Syaz lagy klakar. Dher ingatkan mat rep maner pasal dhe tengok daerah kite. Skali iqaa prasan, "eh, itu kan Syafiq". Betul la! Smile, wave and shout at him. Jauh kan. So pekik la. He tanyer nak gy maner, aku jawab balik la nak gy skola! haha! Eh, rindu kau la Syafiq! Slamat kau ingat kiter! Bukan macam si Iqmal, hilang terus! Fidaiy at least okay. Nampak jugak dhe.

Dah sampai sekolah, event dah start. Kecoh seh.We rested, the rest all jual the waffle. Tangan cramp seh and we feel heavy biler nk angkat. tangan shivering seh! hahah! Anyway, fast forward. Shoped at other class stalls. Was mad at Ben bcause he throw ice at me. Thanks eh Ben. I'm so gonna kill you. I hate you.

Mum, Dad and sis came. They also nak tengok si jantan ni nyerh pompan! haha. oops. bitch. kkay, so when dorang dah balik. kawan2 kuh decide to go inside the hunted house. One person is 2bucks. If 2person $1.50 each. So, Fiqah and Nurin, Suri and Syiqin, Fanna and Naziif. Sumer takut nak masuk bcause the sound effect and people screams boleh dengar dari luar classroom. Biler dah masuk, Gelap eventho the classroom was covered with newspaper. Naziif dari ke belakang pegi depan! Takut ehh? HAHAHAHA! c'mon la Naziif. Aku pun takut seh. Aku pegang fiqah nyer tangan kuat2 sampai tak lepas! Sumer ingatkan tak seram, sekali, tak expected seh! Seram!! haha!

sweetest hello,

5/03/2010 11:22:00 AM